Monday, May 23, 2011

Faith

Religion has always been a contentious topic. While we should not force our beliefs unto others, we should still be allowed our own opinions on it. And here is mine: I’ll probably never convert into Christianity.

I’ll probably never enter any mainstream religion.

Remember the times when we were young and innocent? We were growing up, and we were empowered by newfound strength and knowledge (Remember when we were teenagers and aspired to be rock stars, doctors, scientists, environmentalists and what-not? When we thought everything was possible?). We thought: “Hey, this isn’t too hard. I can do lots of things. I might even be able to change the world!” And when we failed, we always had a parent or a teacher to turn to for advice and comfort. And when the bully pushes you off the swing, all it takes is a word from you, and the teacher will punish him.

But soon we outgrew them all. WE became the teachers and the parents, and WE become the problem-solvers. Then came economic downturns, sickness, deaths, unemployment, divorce, and generally every sucky thing that’s beyond our control. Now, if only we had someone to turn to, someone who can make it all right; someone who takes care of the sheep and punishes the wolves…

Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you: God.

Every sane mind in this dark world desires for a caretaker. When you get fired because of a back-stabbing bastard, you can but curse and swear. But ultimately, he’s the one with the job and you’re the sucker who doesn’t know office politics. Without anything else, this injustice might just rob someone of his sanity and drive him to murder in revenge. Or, you may choose to believe that God (or whoever is up there) will help you get a better job, get the bastard fired, run over by a truck on the way out of the office and go to hell.

The choice is often far too simple. We choose the happier illusion.

In a way, the belief in a higher authority makes our lives much, much easier, and to be fair, much happier. When in doubt, do a good deed and you’ll be repaid, cause he’s up there watching. When in doubt, choose the way God told you to choose when you got 3 consecutive heads in a coin toss and that blessed path is sure to succeed. And when things go wrong, it’s not your fault. It’s just God testing your faith.

Religion is a good thing. But there are always those who pervert it to their own ends.

We are asked to donate in church. We are asked to donate in temples. A little cash as a token of your faith, and you’ll be blessed. And we do so in order for the Vatican and temples to be covered in gold. We do so in order for the holy few to devote their lives to God.

But who are these “holy people”? More importantly, WHO ARE WE TO EVEN DARE PRESUME THAT WE CAN UNDERSTAND GOD? We are but mere mortals. But how is it that some presume to understand His thoughts and wishes, to act as the messenger between the Divine and the Common? They say they have been chosen. I say nay. They are but cheats and liars. Think! If you had a million dollars to donate, will God be happier if you gave them to the needy and poor? Or will he prefer it to be spent building His temple? If you had an hour to spend every Sunday, will God prefer if you spend it helping the elderly and orphans? Or will he prefer it to be spent sitting in a room listening to a speech?

By my call, God is omnipotent and benevolent. He is wise and kind. He is NOT an old white man with a beard who kills those who do not believe in him. He does not care if you spend your Sunday mornings in His worship. He is the creator of the universe, and the law that governs it. Surely he is beyond the little things like church service or abstinence from beef?

All religions have their own rules and restrictions, and by these, they claim, your faith shall be tested. Nay! That faith is but a blindfold for the gullible. What the bishop cannot explain, he requires faith. What the medicine-man cannot heal, he requires faith. That faith is but a pathetic excuse. If being faithful requires you to overlook the facts and soldier on, then what’s the difference between being faithful and being stubborn and stupid?

I believe not in an old man in white robes who asking for an hour every week. I believe not in a man sitting on a lotus flower asking for 3 joss-sticks every dawn and dusk. I believe in a force stronger than what we can possibly imagine; a force that is woven into the very fabric of nature; a power that governs physics, psychology and most importantly, luck. After all, with a little luck, anything is possible. And so, my void is filled. Whenever I’m down, I just think: “I may just get lucky this time”, and go on with life, optimistic and undaunted (If unlucky events are the sixes on the dice, what are the odds of you rolling a hundred consecutive sixes? If I’ve already had 3 consecutive sixes, chances are, the next throw will be something else!).

We will never know what God looks like or what he is thinking, for He is but a macroscopic idea that encompasses our innermost desires and all that we cannot control. He lives only in our mind, unique to each, but nonetheless real. But the organizations that say they are the paths to Him? Bullshit.

Judgment Day, Doomsday, The Rapture: ALL bullshit. These false prophets who made people sell their homes in preparation have gone one lie too far.

They deserve to burn in the deepest levels of Hell.

Friday, May 20, 2011

A Lost Diamond In An Endless Sea

Remember the days when you were young, energetic, and full of questions without answers and answers without questions? The days when we pondered life’s meaning and purpose, and the possible reasons to why a little avian fowl crossed a road?

And then, we grew up and left these unpractical, useless ponderings behind.

As we immerse ourselves in the soulless society, we throw away these unnecessary burdens behind so as to better pursue wealth and happiness. But memories are fragile things that get swept away by the merciless onslaught of time and age. Soon, we lose ourselves, piece by piece, slowly but surely, until naught is left but a clockwork zombie; a shadow, a mockery of what you used to be, what you wanted to be, and what you should have been.

Recently, I have found time aplenty to reflect upon myself. And to my horror (not the cheesy, B-grade horror film type - real, deep-seated horror, the type that brings about clinical depression), what should I see but a little lost lamb trying to fit into the herd? That was not what I had envisioned myself as a couple of years back. I am myself, I am unique. I should build upon my strengths, and find MY place in society, NOT try and fit into any old hole in it! If can’t find the place, I’ll punch and kick society in the arse till it concedes me one!

I am myself, and I am unique. What I am NOT, is a suit-wearing, conforming, button-pushing, clockwork Mr John Smith.

And so, I backtracked on my life, picking up the pieces that define who I am, be they treasure, lousy memories, or just plain junk, and dump them in my den while I sort them out.

Never again shall I make the mistake of losing myself. And neither should you. Keep on thinking, and keep your mind free as it should be. Cast away those restraints that others put on you, and let your mind wander, for it is those wanderings and decisions that define you.

And for me, where better can I let my mind wander than in my little, cozy den?